New Year's Day – Becky Levine

2011.

I’m old enough now to be an age I didn’t think too much about when I was young. Oh, yes, I pictured things in my future (what worrier doesn’t?). I thought about being a grown-up writer; I thought about falling in love and getting married; I thought about being a mother; I thought about having my own house. But–on my virtual-imaginative calendar–all those things happened at some magically young date somewhere in my twenties (Well, okay, the writing part was going to be BIG before I got that old!) and maybe my thirties.

I’m not sure what I thought I’d be doing in my forties.

More writing, at the very least. 🙂

I think, when I was young, visualization was about goals, very specific ones that would be defining achievements. Moments. And I’ve had those goals and those moments and, happily, am still having them. But now, I think, life looks more like a continuum (thank goodness), and visualization seems to me more about the how than the what.

Some people around the blogs have been picking words for their 2011 year. I kind of like that concept, but have never really tried it out for myself. This year, the first time I let my brain skitter in that direction, a word popped up into my mind.

Peace.

Yes, obviously, this kind:

But also my own peacefulness. I look at everything I’m doing, at everything that’s happening with my family, and I don’t want to give any of it up. Let’s face it, I kind of want to add a few more things. Jordan Rosenfeld says it beautifully with her New Year’s post, A Year of Spaciousness.

What I don’t want is this:

So…peace. 🙂

In 2011, I resolve to move forward on my writing path. I will make progress on my YA historical and my picture book. I’ll listen to new story ideas and drop them into folders. I’ll take steps to knock on (and hopefully open) doors so that I can write more nonfiction for kids and teens. I’ll keep critiquing with my critique partners and editing for clients. I’ll keep reading. I will do all this while enjoying the rest of the world–my husband and son, my home, my friends. And I will breathe and take breaks and stop–if not to smell any actual roses–definitely to look around me and see what is being wrought.

The thing about not having planned a year is that you can let it unroll, walk along it, and see what it brings.

Happy 2011 to you all.

Determined.

(Ha! Thought you were going to get an age there, didn’t you?!) No, you get determined, which I’ll talk about in just a little bit. First, I feel like mulling about the actual year.

2010. It’s really an incredible number to have attached to a year, I think. My son, even though he was born in the last millenium, has no conscious memory of any 19xx year.* His life is the 20xx’s and always will be. And yet, for me, that all still feels so recent.

I feel like I’ve settled into this century well. The turn of this century has been good to me; I met my husband and started building my family, my serious commitment to my writing career, and my life as the person I truly wanted to be, all in the 1990s. And the last decade has brought me increased health, happiness, friendships, and self-understanding–all with a huge dose of luck that I am incredibly grateful for.

So what about the coming year? What about 2010? Well, here are my thoughts.

Laura Purdie Salas sets a theme for herself every year. She says she failed on her last year’s one, but I think just stating it as a wish, as a recognition of a need is a success in itself. (Really, Laura!) Because the first step in getting what we want, what we need for our growth, is seeing what that need is. And writing down this want, stating it out loud or writing it out, reminds us that it’s important.

So I’m going to borrow the theme idea from Laura this year. And my theme is determination.

When I picture that word, as an image, I see a backbone. A strong spine, helping me walk through this life I’m creating, helping me sit straight in my writing chair, helping me balance the marketing for The Writing & Critique Group Survival Guide, the writing for my YA historical, the revision for my picture book. I see the spine staying with the exercise and healthy eating I’m finally bringing back to myself, supporting me through the transition of watching my son move into High School, and giving me the flexibility to spend happy time with my family and friends.

In the past, in the 19xx’s, it was too easy for me to sit on one accomplishment, to let time pass without looking for the next. It was too much of a pattern for me to worry about the future, rather than stride forward to meet it, even to impact it. I’ve changed this about myself in the last 20 years, and I am determined to stay on this path. I am determined to watch for and take new turnings as they come along, even to get out my bulldozer and start shoving dirt out of the way for a new road, if that’s what I decide I need to do.

What do you do with the new year? Do you set goals? Do you visualize dreams? Do you pick a theme? And what does this solid, rounded number 2010 make you think about?

Happy New Year to everyone, and may it be an incredible one!

*Of course, when my son read this, he says he DOES have a memory of the 1900s. He can see a big 1999, in bright yellow construction paper, probably on the room of his preschool classroom. Okay, fine. But I swear I’m right about everything else in this post!

Category: New Year's Day

2011…A Year I Didn’t Schedule

If It’s 2010, I Must Be…